Shake's Social: Blog Thy Heart Out (I Think I Really Screwed Up...)

I Think I Really Screwed Up...

Blog Post By Prince Hamlet

Okay guys, it's Prince Hamlet again. I don't have a lot of time to write this, so I'll be straightforward and brief. I messed up bad. Like real bad. Potentially breaking the law bad.

It all started last week when I wrote my latest blog post here. Y'know, the one about my father dying, my uncle marrying my mother, and the ghost of my father seeking me out to demand I avenge his murder? Long story, I know, but those are the bullet points that you need to know. Anyways, I ended the blog post with a call to action to you, my fans, on what I should do to cope with the situation. I got a lot of good suggestions, but the best one I got (or at least the best one at the time) was to set up a sting operation to catch my uncle redhanded and see if he actually murdered my father or not.

So, uh, I came up with an idea that, in hindsight, was a little farfetched. Me and a few of my friends set up this big elaborate play based off this story called The Murder of Gonzago. For those who haven't heard of it, basically all you need to know is that some dies in it by being poisoned in their sleep. Sound familiar, huh? I think you can see where I'm going with this.

I invited my uncle to watch the play and, as I suspected he would, he stormed out of the theatre the second after the scene where the man gets poisoned. I had him right where I wanted him! I went to confront my mother about the whole ordeal and well, this is where things get messy.

Look, one thing led to another and I ended up stabbing and killing the father of my crush. IT WAS AN HONEST MISTAKE, OKAY?! In my defense, the dude was hiding behind the drapes in my mother's room, so he was obviously some sort of creep! I was simply defending both myself and my mother from a potential murder... or something like that.

Okay, so, the important thing you need to take away from this is that my uncle did indeed murder my father in cold blood, and my mother is incredibly unfaithful. The murder was just an unfortunate accident, yeah? There is nothing either good or bad but thinking makes it so, as I always say.

Look I gotta go confront my uncle. And my crush. And probably my lawyers. Speaking of lawyers, none of you spread this blog post around, okay? Just keep it on the DL.

Please.

Peace,

Prince Hamlet